Time to Wake Up

All of the times I cried

And I couldn’t tell you why

Perhaps a part of me knew

I wasn’t good enough for you

My soul cannot handle the mundane

It is not complacent

My heart cannot handle the hurt

It is not unforgiving

My mind cannot handle the turmoil

It is not judgmental

I still don’t understand what you see in them

Or rather, what you see in her

I guess she provided you a sense of stability

A friendship, comfort, support

I couldn’t provide

Wrapped in her influence

You became someone I no longer recognize

You crave that attention

The need to feel wanted

I felt it too

But it was more than enough

To receive that from you

I was living a dream

Until it was time to wake up

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Depression

Sinking through a veil of Darkness

Where no Light can filter through

Your beating heart is the only Sound

While the Loneliness completely surrounds

You Cry out

Can’t clear the Void

The only Happiness you ever knew

Is Nowhere to be found

No Hope exists

This Emptiness

Is now your Home

 

Sorry that my first post in a while has to be so bleak. I wrote this while at my worst. Depression can take you places you never want to be. It can break you down, tear apart your passion, ruin creativity. It can make you someone unrecognizable. It’s hard to break out on your own. If you’re suffering from depression, please seek help. Whether it’s friends, family, or a doctor, it’s much better to talk to someone about how you’re feeling than to let it fester. Speaking from experience, the longer you wait, the worse it gets. Don’t let the Emptiness consume you. There are people who care, even when you feel like they don’t. It’s not something to feel ashamed about. We all have our own problems. What makes the difference is how you deal with it. If you need someone to talk to, feel free to message me. I’ll try to help the best I can.

Moving on from this, I hope to be posting more positive things soon. We shall see. Every day brings something new.

Until then, thanks for reading.

30 Day Writing Challenge: Day 30 – Jump Off

Thirty days already, huh? Man, what am I going to do now? I guess scour the Interwebs for daily writing prompts or something insane like that.

I just want to thank you all for reading. I know some days I produced better content than others (or sometimes I skipped out completely and had to catch up), but, hey, that’s life. I appreciate those who’ve stuck through the good and bad until the end.

And an extra big thanks to Mrs. Sara Crawford, who, without the prompts and the e-book, The 30-Day Writing Challenge, this would still be a barely used blog. Thank you for helping me break out of the procrastination rut.

Keep a look-out for more posts and maybe a book announcement someday (fingers-crossed, anyway).

30 Day Writing Challenge: Day 29 – World Building (Fantasy, Science Fiction, or Dystopian)

Ah, world building. Another favorite element of mine. Since I mainly work in fiction, world building is a major aspect that I focus on.

Currently, I have a pending fantasy trilogy that takes place in a world where legends (both good and bad) are beginning to come true. There are several stories that take place in the modern world, just with a unique twist thrown into the mix (such as werewolves or zombies). And, of course, there’s a science fiction novel where an alien race discovers a capsule of sleeping human astronauts that were wanting to escape a dystopian-style Earth.

World building is a lot of fun and creates a huge playing space for story and characters. That’s one of the things I love about fiction.

30 Day Writing Challenge: Day 28 – Imagination (Children’s Books)

Recently, one of my closest friends had a little baby boy. She asked me to write a story for him. So, here you go, Sarah and Easton. Here’s Little Deer.

Once, there was a Little Deer who lived in the woods with his mother.

One day, he decided to go exploring.

He came across a strange little creature with a brown and yellow rock on its back.

“What are you?” Little Deer asked.

“I am a turtle,” the creature said, “Can’t you tell by my shell?”

“I’ve never seen one before,” Little Deer said. “What does it do?”

“It helps me hide whenever there is danger,” the turtle said, going into his shell.

“Can you teach me how to hide?” Little Deer asked.

“No,” the turtle yelled. “You are too big! Now, go away! I want to take a nap.”

Little Deer kept going until he found a pound.

There were more strange creatures playing on the water. They were covered in feathers and made loud noises.

One swam towards him.

“What are you?” Little Deer asked.

“I am a duck,” the creature said. “Can’t you tell by my feet?” He walked on to the shore so that Little Deer could see his orange, webbed feet.

“I’ve never seen that before,” Little Deer said. “What do they do?”

“They help me swim,” the duck said, waddling back into the water.

“Can you teach me how to swim?” Little Deer asked.

“No,” the duck quacked, “You have hoofs and would sink! Now, go away! I have jokes to tell!” He laughed and flew off to join his friends.

Little Deer started to go home.

He saw another strange creature scratching against a tree. Sticks covered its entire body.

“What are you?” Little Deer asked.

“I am a porcupine,” the creature said, “Can’t you tell by my quills?”

“I’ve never seen them before,” Little Deer said, “What do they do?”

“They help scare away anything that bothers me,” she said, turning her spikes toward Little Deer.

“Can you teach me how to scare things?”

“No,” the porcupine snorted, “You are just a deer. No, go away! I have trees to scratch!”

Little Deer ran away from the porcupine before she could use her quills on him.

When Little Deer arrived home, he was very sad.

“What’s wrong Little Deer?” His mother asked.

“I can’t hide because I don’t have a shell,” he said quietly.

“Silly Little Deer, you don’t need a shell to hide. That’s why you have spots,” his mother said.

“I can’t swim because I don’t have webbed feet,” Little Deer cried.

“Silly Little Deer, you don’t need to swim when you can jump across the pond,” his mother laughed.

“I can’t scare away things because I don’t have quills,” Little Deer sniffed.

“Silly Little Deer, you don’t need quills when you’ll grow antlers! Don’t be sad just because you don’t have what the other creatures have. You’re different from them and that’s okay. There’s nothing wrong with being you,” his mother said. “I will always love you even without a shell to hide in, webbed feet to swim, and quills to protect you.”

Little Deer flicked his tail and bounced around her happily, feeling much better. “Thank you Momma! I love you too!”

From that day on, it didn’t matter what kind of creature Little Deer met. He was always proud of who he was.

30 Day Writing Challenge: Day 27 – Follow Your Obsessions (Fan Fiction)

All right, I’ll admit. I’m a HUGE fan fiction writer. Just about anything I’ve seen you can bet that I’ve created a character for it. Something about creating someone and putting them into the same situations along with my favorite characters, I don’t know, it just makes things more engaging I guess and I love it.

There’s only one person in this world, however, that I trust enough to let them read anything without worrying about being judged to pieces (he knows who he is). But something cool that I’ll share is that Kasey and A Hunter’s Tale came from a fan fiction that started from the show, ‘Supernatural’. I’ve been told by several readers that they see a lot of likeness and, well, that’s why. Because Kasey and her story grew from an inspiration from one of my favorite TV shows!

30 Day Writing Challenge: Day 26 – Sound and Rhythm (Spoken Word)

Can you hear what you’re saying?

It doesn’t make any sense!

How can things be the same after so much time has passed?

I come from a new generation.

One that’s completely different than yours.

With new phases and trends.

We want different things.

No matter how much you’d like for us to be, we cannot be friends.